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The Keys to Creating a Successful Online Dating Profile

Let’s face facts – online dating sucks. Unless you’re unemployed sitting at home all day with nothing to do, scrolling through endless profiles on your phone hoping to find “the one”, or in some cases, “the one right now”, is arduous and time consuming. Sure, you can click a button or swipe your screen and let someone know you like them – but that’s just the beginning of the merry-go-round cycle you ride when you sign-up to play in the cyber world of love. For some, it’s a convenient option to connect with a community of romantic prospects; and for others, the motivation is more criminal – like preying upon the lonely and trustworthy for iTunes gift cards or bank-wired funds. It can be a mixed bag of experiences from casual to serious when we engage online, but one thing is certain… it isn’t an easy process. When we open up an online dating account, we are in essence, putting our hearts and histories on the line – without knowing which fish will land on our hook, whether they be real or not. All we can govern is ourselves, so before someone accuses you of false advertising, steer clear of these common, and sometimes silly mistakes people make with their online dating profiles. Here are a few things you should and shouldn’t be doing in the name of love.

The DO’s and the DON’Ts…

PROFILE 101

  • CHOOSE A SOLID PROFILE NAME. Your profile name is the first thing people judge you on, so avoid choosing a handle that can be construed as suggestive or crude. A repulsive profile name will do just that – keep others away. Do you see yourself dating somebody who goes by bitchpleez or nothinbuttrouble? Exactly. Keep it simple and curb the temptation to be overly funny or clever with your moniker. Your initials and birthday month or year will suffice, then let your profile do the talking from there. And for all you dudes out there… Mr. Right and Fun Guy have all been taken ten thousand times over, so skip the exhausted, cliched name and opt for something less gag-worthy.

  • DON’T LIE ABOUT YOUR AGE. There’s nothing worse than misleading someone, and lying about your age is never acceptable. Just because you feel 35, but are really 45, doesn’t mean you should royally fib in order to attract a younger counterpart. Hearing a person say that they only have things in common with people half their age is a HUGE RED FLAG, not to mention hella embarrassing when they finally get caught in the lie. If you’re old enough to sign-up for the service, you should be mature enough not to deceive others about your many years on earth. Trying to pass yourself off as some young thing when you’re not is uber creepy, and honestly says a lot about you – namely that you’re an untrustworthy character.
  • KEEP IT SHORT AND SWEET. It’s all too easy to turn your dating profile into a personal manifesto, or a laundry list of things you are not going to “put up with” this time around. Skip the negativity. Your profile should be relatively upbeat, easy to read, and get to the core of what you’re hoping to find while providing some general information about yourself. You don’t have to recount your entire life story from Kindergarten on, nor list every nuance about what makes you you. Save the autobiography for when you finally connect and start messaging someone.

  • AVOID USING THE WORD “DRAMA”. WAY TOO MANY profiles contain the word “drama”. It’s another red flag when someone goes out of their way to let you know that they are “drama free”. Do you walk around telling people that you don’t shoplift? No. So, why would you feel the need to say “no drama here” unless you ARE dramatic? When you make a statement like “zero drama”, it only implies that you’ve HAD drama, and you’re so used to it that you’re letting others know upfront that you will not take it any longer. Nothing scares off a potential paramour more than a guy or gal who consistently attracts trouble in their life, so think twice about what you are really saying when you use the word “drama”.

  • RETIRE THE NOTION OF “LOOKING FOR MY PARTNER IN CRIME”. Here’s another head scratcher… You’re not on a dating site hoping to find your next wheel man; If you want to knock over a bank, head straight to Craigslist and search for your future jail mate there. This sappy, nonsensical phrase is so overused, it’s right up there with “Romeo seeking Juliet”. Yawn. It’s been hacked-to-death so often, there are retaliatory profiles specifically poking fun of this lame relationship goal. And while we’re at it… can we please stop saying, “a pot looking for its lid”?

PROFILE PICS 101

  • DON’T PHOTOSHOP. You’re not fooling anybody by posting a magazine-worthy, unrealistic portrait of an incredibly smooth, unblemished, wrinkle-free face. Be true to yourself and upload an accurate picture of what you really look like. A heavily airbrushed face makes you look like a mannequin and screams insecurity. Nobody’s walking around with cartoon bunny ears and a Jessica Rabbit pout. A photo of a middle-aged woman without a crease in her face is just downright scary. Besides… you’ve earned those beautiful lines by racking up valuable life experiences that shouldn’t be erased just so you can swim in the shallow end of the vanity pool. So, be proud of who you are and embrace your face.

  • CLEAR PICTURES ONLY! It’s shocking that it even needs mentioning, but it’s a common profile pic offender. It’s virtually impossible to take a blurry picture nowadays with all the modern technology out there; so unless you’re driving at high-speeds while shaking the camera lens, you most certainly can take a clear and concise picture of yourself. A fuzzy pic or one where you are 100 yards off into the distance is pointless. People want to see what you look like UP CLOSE. Standing under a tree with a huge branch in front of your face is one image you shouldn’t be uploading to your profile.

  • POST PICTURES YOU ARE ACTUALLY IN. A sailboat out on the horizon, a snowy mountain top with an eagle soaring overhead, or a dog catching a frisbee mid-air are all no bueno. If people wanted to see an amazing sunset or wildlife photography they wouldn’t be on a dating site, they’d be scrolling through nationalgeographic.com. Post pictures of just YOU. If you’re in a group photo, great; if you’re not, then don’t upload it.

  • USE CURRENT IMAGES. It’s the most frequent and unfortunate dating story out there… You show up to meet your date at a local watering hole only to be greeted by a much older version of the face you’ve grown accustomed to looking at on your phone or computer screen. When you post decades old photos on your profile, you are essentially scamming potential suitors with your bait and switch technique. Choose photos that were taken within a year, and if you don’t have any recent pics, then it’s an easy thing to fix. Simply take out your smartphone, hold the camera in front of you and snap. Voila! Sure beats the awkwardness you’ll face when you show up not looking like your 20-something self at 40.

  • CLEAN IT UP. Taking a picture with a huge pile of dirty laundry on the floor is not the best backdrop for your profile picture. It makes you look like a slob and no one wants to date somebody who can’t clean up a mess. Seeing a toilet in the background of a bathroom selfie is also something you should think twice about before flexing your arms in the mirror. Take a glance at your surroundings before reaching for the camera. The backdrop of every image provides key details into the lives people lead… shouldn’t yours look attractive?

For over a quarter-century, MeMoi has been at the forefront of the women’s legwear industry, designing socks, tights, leggings, shapewear, sleepwear, lingerie and loungwear for women.

One Comment

  • Michael Lazaro

    Fantastic and truthful write up. As an online dater, i can agree with all these points. Excellent guide for those putting themselves out there and online.

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